By: Everhardt Lovegood
(Knockoff Alley, 5 July) In a moment of high drama clearly staged for the benefit of two reporters present at the Troll’s Head on the evening of 4 July, several tavern regulars and other assorted layabouts got together a little show centered around impugning the reputation of one Abigail Brick, said (by them) to be a “dark witch.”
By: Incompertus Scriptor
There are continuing reports that the mythical figure of Father Thames, a statue that has been rumoured to contain many of the secrets of London itself, has been seen for sale in Knockoff Alley.
By: Everhardt Lovegood
(Oahu, 5 July) Quidditch tryouts began this week with something literally earthshaking, when the Quidditch Pitch along with the rest of the Greater Hogwarts area was roiled by a major earthquake that occurred at approximately 3:00 p.m. SLT on Thursday 5 July. The temblor struck just as tryouts for the Gryffindor House team were getting started, and knocked out all utility services on Oahu (which is home to Hogwarts School and the Quidditch Pitch). Hearing of our plight, however, sympathetic residents of a nearby land generously permitted the entire Quidditch Pitch to be magically relocated to their domain so that tryouts could continue.
By: Incompertus Scriptor
Everyone knows that back in the 1600’s the Wizard Balfour Blane founded the Committee on Experimental Charms to deal with a spate of new spells. What many do not know is that Blane was a constant tinkerer and experimenter himself, and that he created a host of powerful charms he decided were not safe for public use.
By: Everhardt Lovegood
Professor Ewan Sautereau currently teaches Ancient Runes at Hogwarts School, and also holds the post of Minister, Ministry for International Magical Cooperation. Professor Sautereau was born in Scotland of a Scottish, Muggle father, and a French, witch mother, both of whom are deceased. He says the he does not have any immediate family still living, only distant cousins. He still mourns the untimely and tragic passing of his beloved fiancée, Natalia, at the hands of You-Know-Who. Professor Sautereau enjoys doing research within the field of Ancient Runes, reading any kind of literature, both Muggle and Magical, and dabbling about the kitchen. He also enjoys meeting witches and wizards from different nations and learning their languages. His favorite places to and relax are either in his castle office, or at his home in Les Mehnirs.
By: Everhardt Lovegood
One of the Leaky Cauldron regulars approached me earlier this week to protest a story titled “PROTECT YOUR GIRLS– STOCK UP ON SILVER BULLETS!” that the Quibbler had run in last week’s edition under the byline “A Concerned Parent.” The gist of that story had been that there is a werewolf in the vicinity of the School who preys on young girls, and that more should be done to protect the children, etc. etc. — a sentiment which should have raised few eyebrows.
By: Curious Rousselot, on behalf of the Hogwarts Reborn group
Today we, the members of the Hogwarts Reborn group in Second Life, shed a unified tear for the passing of Trae. Trae is the real life brother of our friend, Korak Constantin.
Though we do not know the real-life name of Korak, we still count him among our dear friends and trust that he knows people from around the world are sending him and his family their sympathy and prayers.
By: Everhardt Lovegood
This Saturday last, Arithmacy Professor Broome led an intrepid troop of junior aurors to the dungeons for a top-secret mission of which the Quibbler is your exclusive source. Prof. Broome and his rosy cheeked companions went to the lowest level of the Hogwarts dungeon, there to do battle with the sinister engorged Man-Eating Frog that has inhabited the School from time immemorial. Reportedly, the Frog had imbibed old discarded potions and had consequently grown to gargantuan proportions in the dark, dank dungeon. Armed only with their wands and a few magical crackers, the crack team of youngsters, coached by Prof. Broome managed to corral said amphibian.
According to a certain Hufflepuff first year who was an eye-witness to these events, “It turns out it was just a Welsh Gilly Toad…but it had got into some old engorgement potions or some such. They stunned it into passivity with the crackers, and didn’t even hurt it. Now…once its got an antidote and some curing, the Gryffindors are gonna adopt it. Aside from a few warts, everyone is fine!”
Quibbler Kudos to Professor Broome!
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PROTECT YOUR GIRLS– STOCK UP ON SILVER BULLETS!
By: A Concerned Parent
Rumors have been flying all over Hogwarts campus about werewolves since the blue moon, and it turns out that more that half of them are true! A dangerous animal is in our midst, and in his human form he has admitted several times to his perverse master plan: to starting a “harem” of female werewolves handpicked from the best and brightest of our students at Hogwarts!
